What a crazy whirlwind of a week, you guys! I have finally had a few days to catch my breath after last week's music video and ICM week!
On Easter Sunday my Dad's side of the family were all gathered around my dad and stepmom's dining room table. The conversation was wrapping up and I had to get down to the hotel to unload all of Heather's look for the week, and had a music video to direct the next day, so I was in a bit of a hurry. As I was getting ready to dump our plates in the dishwasher my dad tells us all that my grandmother has an announcement to make. I assumed we were going to be making the switch over to assisted living, or she decided to take up skydiving. You never know. She looks at us all and announces that she's got breast cancer-and a bad case of one at that.
I must admit that the first wave of emotions hit me so hard that I was left feeling numb. It wasn't until I was driving home that night from completing work that it even hit me at all. Bursting out into tears at 10pm on the highway was not my finest moment, but clearly it was something I needed to do. Selfishly I thought "How many more people can I lose to this stupid disease?" I recalled losing two friends that had felt like family and my favorite aunt within six months of each other. I cried for them too. I also knew that this meant that I now officially have breast cancer on both sides of my family. Have you ever wondered why I think so little of breasts? Well, now you know. Ha!
While I was wiping away my tears I remembered an interaction I had with my grandmother not that long ago. We met up for lunch and she gave me a mink coat that she had purchased. My grandmother was one of the first female real estate agents in our area--a true Girl Boss before that phrase was even coined. She loved this mink coat and worked very hard for it. I asked her why she never wore it, and she said very matter of factly that she never felt like she went anywhere special enough to wear it, so this token of how hard she had worked was sitting in the back of her closet. Now, me being a vegan that's not into new leather and fur, I did the practical option she gave me. She told me to sell it or use it for a shoot. I sold it and used the money to buy her lunch and stashed the rest away.
That made an impact on me in a way that I doubt she would even know. How many times do we save things for a special day only to have that day never come? How many of us have fancy makeup or perfume sitting on a table because we don't want to "waste" it? I know that all of us have an underwear drawer full of "practical" and "pretty" pieces, but neither that fall into both categories. Do any of you spring for a latte instead of your black cold brew order when you've got something special to celebrate? Or do you have a candle that you only burn when company is around because it's your "good" one?
I used to.
I think "saving the good stuff" is a metaphor for the way a lot of us live our lives. We don't celebrate the small things that seem mundane. How many days that have felt like nothing special could be turned into something extraordinary? It's my new goal to start making every day feel like a celebration.
I went to wrap up the remaining returns on the pulls that I did for the week. I wanted to treat myself for the hard work that I had done with a pair of new shoes. I looked at a pair of beautiful Gucci heels that were covered in gold glitter. I knew that those shoes would only work for certain occasions. While admiring those, I came across a pair of velvet Chanel loafers. The gold chain detailing reminded me of the hardware on the beautiful flap bags, and the low heel meant that these were a shoe that I could literally wear everywhere in any situation. Like Cinderella's glass slipper, the loafer slid onto my feet with great ease. I stood up to walk to the mirror and felt like I was walking on a cloud. I had just purchased shoes that would make every single thing from going to the grocery store to doing a quick change on a client feel like a celebration. I won't be "saving" these shoes for the right occasion. I'm going to spend my time making every day FEEL like the right occasion to wear such beautiful slippers.
My favorite movie as a kid was "The Wizard of Oz" (Imagine that-my favorite childhood movie revolves around a pair of shoes.) But the part that stuck with me was Glinda telling Dorothy that she had the power to go home all along. I don't know why Dorothy would want to go back home to Kansas when she could live in Oz, but hey, feminism is all about respecting other women's choices, right? But the part that struck a chord with little Payton was having the power to be in control of how you see the world at all times.
So, consider these my Ruby Slippers.
There's No Place Like Home.