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Hang Up Your Hangups

When I meet with my clients, the first thing I ask them is: What are you not comfortable with showing? This question could mean whatever they want it to mean. I have worked with several artists that didn't feel comfortable showing a lot of skin because their management wanted to brand them as wholesome. But, when I get a client that has a laundry list of what they consider "problem areas" then I know that we have bigger fish to fry.

When my clients hire me to style them, they really are hiring me to treat symptoms of a much bigger problem. I'm usually brought in to style someone who is just trying to address their style, not realizing that their personal style (or lack thereof) is a reflection on other things happening in their lives. One woman's "I need to know how to dress my new body." may very well be a cry out for "I need to learn how to accept my new body after losing weight, having kids, etc. etc." or "I want to dress more polished." usually ends up translating to "I can't control anything else about my life, so I at least want to control my closet." At the end of the day, it 99.9 percent of the time boils down to "I want to feel good about my body."

Everyone has their best features, and their not so great features. That statement rings true from everyone. I've had super models, Grammy winners, CEOs of successful companies, and moms all tell me the exact same thing. "I hate my arms." or "My boobs aren't big enough." and the list goes on and on. Notice, that they never really answered my question. They took "What are you not comfortable with showing?" and turned it into "What do you hate about yourself?"

I assure you that if you stand in front of the mirror naked long enough, you will find something to hate. I am so guilty of it. I did it this morning! My least favorite part about myself is my stomach. I have struggled with my weight as long as I can remember. My hips are covered in stretch marks. The skin on my entire body is so sensitive, that the slightest thing breaks me out. So, when I was looking in the mirror today, and pulling faces at my uneven skin tone, and the food baby from last night that I was convinced the rest of the world could see, I have to talk myself down, just like I've talked many of the most beautiful people down. Here is an example of what one of those conversations look like.

Oh, god, oh god! I'm so fat right now. I can't stand to look at myself.

What makes you say that?

I just have this awful food baby from last night. My husband and I went out and got Indian food, and I knew I ate too much! I should have just-

Oh! Your husband took you out? That's so thoughtful! How was the food?

It was SOOOO good, girl! I ate WAY too much! But we had such a great time! <